Mistress Sidonia's Femdom Blog

A Beginner’s Guide
to Wearing a Chastity Device Pt3
Or everything you ever wanted to know about male chastity cages

Keyholder Solutions and Safety
The keyholder (whether a partner or yourself) plays a critical role in chastity. Safety is paramount, especially for emergency access.

1. Traditional Padlocks & Keys
♦   Keep a spare key in a secure but accessible location, like a locked box with a code only you or your partner know.
♦   For solo users, consider sealing the key in an envelope with a signature to prevent impulsive unlocking.
♦   The number one problem I have experienced with key padlocks is the keys breaking in the lock! Always use a quality padlock and key, if the key or keyhole is becoming degraded (they do get wet a lot or lathered in sad pre-cum tears) replace them immediately.
♦   The advantage of using a traditional metal padlock is that it provides a strong psychological sense of security, as the tangible, physical act of locking and unlocking feels definitive and can become a ritualistic act. The weight and feel of metal padlocks contribute to this perception, making them a trusted choice for securing belongings. Additionally, padlocks can serve as ownership markers when engraved with ‘Property of’ followed by a name or initials.

2. Numbered Plastic Lock Tags
Plastic lock tags are cuttable plastic numbered tags that can be used instead of locks, they are lighter than traditional padlocks and can be quickly removed in urgent or emergency situations. They are numbered so your keyholder will always know if this is done without their direct permission.

Recommended: Personally, I think Plastic Lock Tags are the perfect solution for beginners and short-term chastity play: they are lightweight, unbreakable, easily removable in an emergency, and numbered, so you’ll always know if they’ve been removed—it’s unlikely the sub will be able to find another. Better than padlocks, which can be picked or there might be ‘other keys’ in play!

Keyholder Solutions

3. Key Safes
A key safe with a combination code is a great option for emergency access. Share the code with a trusted partner or store it securely. (You can also use ones with timers to great effect as part of chastity games. Back in the day I would post keys back to subs, they would have to wait patiently by the post box for their release to arrive. What could go wrong!)

4. Digital Devices
Some modern chastity devices integrate with apps, allowing remote locking/unlocking. These are ideal for long-distance relationships but require a reliable device, internet and battery management!

5. Safety Protocols
♦   Agree on a safe word or signal for immediate removal, no questions asked.
♦   Check in regularly with your keyholder to discuss comfort and emotional well-being.
♦   If swelling, pain, or injury occurs, remove the device immediately and seek medical advice if needed.

Additional Tips for Beginners

♦   Hygiene is Critical: Clean the device and your skin daily. Remove the device for thorough cleaning every few days, long term uses will need a more regular cleaning plan/schedule.

♦   Start with Open Designs: Devices with open tips or ventilation holes are easier for beginners to manage.

♦   Experiment with Activities: Test the device during different activities (sitting, walking, exercising) to ensure it’s practical for your lifestyle.

♦   Mental Preparation: Chastity can evoke strong emotions, from excitement to frustration. Be patient with yourself and communicate openly with your partner.

♦   Community Support: Online forums or communities (like those on Reddit or FetLife) offer tips and support from experienced users. Always verify advice with trusted sources.

Common Challenges and Solutions

♦   Erection Discomfort: Morning erections are normal. Relax, breathe deeply, or take a cold shower to reduce arousal. Devices with slight give (like silicone) can help.

♦   Chafing: Apply a thin layer of lubricant. Switch to a larger ring if irritation persists.

♦   Difficulty Urinating: Align the device properly and sit during urination to minimise mess. Open-tip devices are easier for this.

♦   Emotional Struggles: Feeling restricted can be intense. Set clear time limits and check in with yourself or your partner regularly.

Wearing a chastity device can be a rewarding journey, whether you’re exploring personal boundaries, deepening intimacy with a partner, or submitting to the control of a dominant partner. Start with a well-fitted, comfortable device, build up wear time gradually, and prioritise hygiene and safety. Accessories like lubricants, stockings, and locking tags can make the experience smoother, while open communication with your keyholder ensures trust and enjoyment. Listen to your body, take breaks when needed, and approach chastity with curiosity and care. With patience and practice, chastity can become a fulfilling part of your sexual journey. Enjoy the exploration, and play safe!

Read Part 1: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 2: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 3: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play

A Beginner’s Guide
to Wearing a Chastity Device Pt2
Or everything you ever wanted to know about male chastity cages

Extreme & Advanced Devices & Styles
Extreme chastity devices, such as tiny “micro” cages, those with sharp pegs or teeth, and designs incorporating sounds, are specialised options intended for advanced users seeking intense restriction, discomfort, or control. These devices push boundaries beyond standard chastity, often blending physical restraint with elements of pain or extreme submission.

These devices are only for very experienced Advanced users, those comfortable with urethral play, extreme BDSM players or consensual dynamics involving pain &  punishment.

♦   Micro Chastity Devices
These are ultra-small, tiny cages, often called “nub” or “micro” devices, designed to compress the penis to an extremely confined size, sometimes less than an half an inch in length. The cage tightly encases the flaccid penis, preventing any expansion or erection. The extreme confinement can cause discomfort, especially during attempted erections, amplifying the sense of restriction and control. Hygiene requires diligence due to limited airflow.

♦   Chastity Devices with Sharp Pegs or Teeth
These often metal cages feature internal spikes, pegs, or “teeth” (blunt or sharp metal points) that press against the penis, particularly during arousal or attempted erections. Designs vary, but quality designs allow for the depth of these pegs to be adjusted using a hex key. The “teeth” may line the interior of the cage or focus on specific areas, like the shaft or tip. When flaccid, the pegs may be barely noticeable, but any erection causes the skin to press against the spikes, delivering discomfort or mild pain as a deterrent against arousal, heightens discipline, and appeals to those into pain play. 

Extreme & Advanced Devices & Styles

♦    Chastity Devices with Sounds
These incorporate a urethral sound, a thin, smooth rod (usually metal or silicone) inserted into the urethra, attached to or integrated with the cage. The sound may be fixed or removable, often locking the cage in place. Some use metal for rigidity, with a hollow or solid sound (4-8 mm in diameter, varying lengths). Some designs align the sound with a cage tip for stability and deeper control. The sound restricts urethral access, prevents full erections, and creates a unique, invasive sensation, ranging from mild pressure to discomfort, especially during movement or arousal. Lubrication and sterilisation are critical. They provide intense control, unique psychological and physical sensation, and high security. Howver carry the risk of urinary tract infections, discomfort, or injury if not properly sized, cleaned, or lubricated; they are not suitable for prolonged wear without breaks. Always research reputable manufacturers for quality and reliability.

Important Considerations/ Risks
Extreme devices carry risks, are only for experienced users they must fit properly, need hygiene management. Research reputable manufacturers and consult a kink-aware professional if unsure.

Starting Out: How Long to Wear a Chastity Device

Wearing a chastity device is a gradual process. Rushing into long-term wear can lead to discomfort or problems. Here’s how to build up wear time safely:

♦  First Things First: Prior to putting on a chastity device consider abstaining for a few days or even a week to get accustomed to the feelings. It might feel exciting to start your first denial period in a chastity device, the reality is that the combination of coping with the device and managing your desire to orgasm can be challenging if you’re not prepared.

1. Initial Wear

♦   Start Small: Begin with short sessions of 1–2 hours while awake to get accustomed to the sensation. Wear the device during low-activity periods, like watching TV or reading.

♦   Check for Comfort: After each session, inspect your skin for redness, chafing, or numbness. Mild redness is normal, but persistent pain or discolouration means the device is too tight or needs adjustment.

2. Gradual Build-Up

♦   Daily Wear: Once comfortable, extend wear time to 4–6 hours daily over a week. Experiment with light activities like walking or sitting.

♦   Overnight Wear: After a week of successful daytime wear, try wearing the device overnight for one night. Ensure you’re in a safe environment with access to the key in case of discomfort.

♦   Extended Periods: Gradually increase to 24–48 hours, then up to a week, always listening to your body. Most beginners take 2–4 weeks to comfortably wear a device for extended periods.

3. Listen to Your Body

Your body will signal if something’s wrong. Watch for:
♦    Pain or Numbness: Indicates a device that’s too tight or improperly fitted.
♦   Chafing or Irritation: May require lubrication, a different material or a better quality device.
♦    Swelling or Discolouration: Stop wearing immediately!
♦   Hygiene Issues: Sweat or poor cleaning can lead to infections. Clean the device and your skin daily with mild soap and water. This is often the number one issue with chastity devices they (unfortunately) need to be regularly removed and cleaned fully.) Those wearing chastity for long periods, anything over 24hrs especially 24/7 must work in a daily cleaning ritual.
♦   Take breaks if you experience discomfort. It’s normal to need time to adjust.

4. Basics, Accessories and Tools for Comfort

♦   Basics: Put on your chastity device while you are flaccid!!! With base rings learn to push each ball separately through the base ring, if it a fixed size.

♦    Cotton Buds: Cotton buds (Q-tips) can help guide the penis into the cage, especially for smaller or curved devices. Use it to gently adjust positioning without forcing the skin. Or to push the skin down to prevent pinching when closing the ring/device. 

♦   Lubricants: Use water-based lubricants to ease the device onto the skin and reduce friction. Avoid silicone-based lubes with silicone devices, as they can degrade the material. Apply a small amount to the base ring and cage interior before putting it on.

♦   Waist Belts: Belts provide additional support and security especially for heavier devices. 

The Stocking Method
Help For Putting on Difficult cages 

♦   For male devices, putting on a tight cage can be challenging. Use a thin, clean stocking (like a nylon or pantyhose), cut off below the knee:

1. Pull the cut stocking over the penis.
2. Slide the cage over the stocking, guiding the penis into place.
3. Gently pull the stocking out, leaving the penis inside the cage.

This method reduces pinching and makes application smoother obviously doesn’t work with more extreme or covering devices. 

Read Part 1: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 2: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play
Read Part 3: A Beginner’s Guide to Femdom Chastity Play