The Cane – The Classic English Discipline Tool Pt 2

Dominalisa-schoolmarm-earpullingEar pulling, the perfect entrée before the main course of a hard, cold, caning – here to be metered out by classic school marm Domina Liza

The Great Equaliser
Caning is probably one of the most revered of the disciplinary arts taking some time to perfect. A perfect cane stroke needs a minimum amount of effort, you don’t have to throw your whole body into it. In fact the greatest accuracy is achieved with the minimum variation of movement. This is probably one of the reasons as to why the cane is such a favoured disciplinary tool. The stature and strength of the disciplinarian is immaterial as it is one’s technique that is all-important -the cane is certainly a great equalizer for women.

Before beginning a punishment with the cane, it is really advisable to have a very thorough warm up to help prevent serious bruises and cuts. Despite appearances canes are very severe implements, so never use full force blows as they may cause damage to underlying tissue and nerves.

Caning Techniques
There are two different techniques to caning someone. Firstly with a ‘wrist only’ movement and secondly, with an ‘arm and wrist’ movement. I would suggest that beginners (and when caning in an area with limited space/height) should always use the wrist movement. It is also the stroke I prefer to use as it has a greater degree of accuracy. Hold the cane in your hand, tuck your elbow into your body and using only your lower arm, use a fast wrist motion to flick the cane at the target. If you cane without moving your wrist you cannot get any speed into the motion of the stroke or that lovely ‘swish’ noise, as you are not really using the flexibility of the cane.

naval-thrashing-canePetty Officer Wren Jessica Woods about to dish out a naval thrashing.

The ‘arm and wrist’ movement involves lifting up and bringing down your arm, putting the force of your shoulder behind the stroke, finishing the stroke with the wrist movement. The arm can move either up or out for this motion. Make sure you practice the movement and measure the stroke lots of times before beginning the punishment because with this technique it is easy to be inaccurate. If you have never caned someone before try holding the cane about a third of the way in, this makes it shorter, less flexible and easier to control. Only as you gain confidence move your hand back.

After striking the bottom you can either follow through with a stroke that leaves the cane firmly planted on the buttocks or allow the cane to bounce back and lift away from the area. Following through will make the stroke more painful and ‘thumpy’, this is because you are passing on all the kinetic energy of the stroke into the buttocks.

Another caning technique is that of ‘bastinado’  a rapid continuous drumming of the skin often used for punishing the feet. In old Public School films I have seen the punisher run across a room to administer the stroke. I don’t personally believe this will make a great deal of difference to the stroke, (except to make it more difficult to be accurate). I am sure, however, it does have some great psychological effect on the frightened recipient.

headgirl-cane-punishmentI remember this film, I was the ‘Vice Head’ Girl and he was the ‘Sub’ Prefect (genuine British School badges) I did loads of bad stuff then had him blamed no wonder I’m laughing! Here the caning is being dished out by the hard left-hander Miss Birch.

There is also the possibility of being caned in public or in front of someone. Here added to the pain of the cane is the insult of humiliation, having your trousers pulled-down (or skirt pulled-up) then your panties lowered and punished while everyone watches.

Read the full article here:
Part 1 The Cane – The Classic English Discipline Tool
Part 2 The Cane – The Classic English Discipline Tool
Part 3 The Cane – The Classic English Discipline Tool

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So What Is An F.L.R.? Female Led Relationship

Lovely Lady Nina Birch is taking a firm hand in this FLR

So What Is An F.L R.?

F.L.R stands for Female Led Relationship – an intimate personal relationship where the female partner has control over the male. The nature of this power dynamic can range from only affecting certain facets e.g. in the bedroom or decision making; to total command over all aspects of the partnership.

As feminists and gender equality activists have started to dismantle and challenge traditional social hierarchies, we’re beginning to see an increase in the amount of women and men who are openly pursuing female led relationships, women who want to take the lead and men who are seeking strong, capable women.

Traditionally men have held this authoritative role within relationships, households and families but today with the constraints removed many women are finding the leadership role natural to them. And not just in relationships but for entire nations. From single mothers to intelligent business women to heads of state, women are quickly proving to men that they are just as competent. (At the time of writing this, female heads of state are incumbent in: the UK, Romania, Germany, Bangladesh, Namibia, Iceland, Peru, New Zealand, Singapore, Serbia, Norway – far too many to mention them all).

So it’s good news for both sexes as it means men no longer need to project a machismo and take on all the pressures of being providers. While it’s liberating for alpha women, (who unlike men – who are perceived as natural leaders, were seen as overbearing and bossy,) as they now can embrace their strong intelligent personas. People irrelevant of their sex can act in accordance with their own nature without fear of social stigma.

Madame Caramel is a true exponent of an FLR with her boy Joris always at her beck & call ~ Visit her website here

FLR & Femdom
It’s important to recognise that FLRs exist on a spectrum and here at The English Mansion and within the world of femdom we are primarily interested in exploring its furthermost position. FLRs have direct parallels with the 247 or owned slave BDSM dynamic and can be the basis for a sub/dom paring or even marriage. (They probably just have less rubber & leather and no need of a dungeon.)

Femdom FLRs are where the woman takes total control and makes all the decisions in her relationship. She probably won’t work instead her partner/husband will provide and cater to her every need, worshipping her like a goddess. Sexually she will take strict command in the bedroom, making and training her partner/husband to serve her sexual needs. Chastity devices, enforced feminisation and cuckolding may play an important part of this training.

Note: What FLR isn’t – it isn’t an abusive relationship but one agreed on or one that just naturally works; it isn’t one that resembles a mother/child dymanic, rather than a healthy adult relationship; and it isn’t an ongoing exhausting power struggle.

In Femdom FLRs, women are goddess to be worshiped & adored ~ Here’s the stunning Madame Caramel, on you knees boys ~ Visit her website here

Author and blogger Lady Alexa has written extensively on FLR, she herself is engaged in a FLR with her feminised and compliant husband. So I shall recite her excellent 10 Steps to a FLR taken from her blog post Developing an FLR Female-Led Relationship. She also writes regular posts and books about FLR, feminisation and male submission at

The 10 Steps To A Sucessfull FLR

There are a number of steps you will need to take to develop an FLR. Here is my own list below. Although I’m sure there have been different approaches, I believe the fundamentals are the same.

1. A list of rules and regulations for the husband/male partner to follow. I suggest they are written down and pinned up. These set the parameters of the relationship, a sort of contract.

2. Establish yourself as the female authority figure. This is achieved in many ways, not least renaming him and insisting on him curtseying (or bowing) to you. I believe that it really helps to cement the different status levels and therefore renaming is important. If your husband or partner is calling you by a cute pet name then the status level is undermined. In my own marriage I insist on being referred to as Mistress. Since I have feminised my husband as part of the FLR process he now has a female name. This approach is very effective and I do encourage it for all FLRs.

3. Remove his bad habits. This includes his personal hygiene, sitting down on the toilet, arguing, removal of machismo, submissiveness and politeness to women and so on. This can take time and is achieved through repetition, coaching and punishment

4. The domestic chores become the role of your male. He should be required to do all the house cleaning and chores including washing and ironing the clothes, cooking, doing the dishes, cleaning the toilet and bath, and all other domestic work in the house. The woman may set out a roster of weekly chores for the man to do each week. Sometimes I like to cook or even do some housework but that would be my choice and is ad-hoc at my discretion.

5. Control his clothing. I believe this to be one of the most important areas to address in any FLR. There are three reasons for this is my mind. Firstly, it enforces his status level and ensures he wears clothing you enjoy seeing him in. Regarding status, people react to clothing as symbols of position and power or of lowly status. Different women employ different techniques here but the key is demonstration of the status differential. The woman is the General, the CEO, the Chief of Police. The man is the private, the admin assistant, the secretary, domestic help. We therefore need to dress them differently. Many women like to keep their men naked at home and I also like this approach and adopt it or variations of it at times. However, in my case I prefer to feminise my husband and make him wear very revealing and very feminine clothing. Short skirts and dresses emphasise his status as a domestic assistant to me. Secondly being naked or being forced to wear feminine clothing makes the male more feminine which is a quality you need to ensure. It helps to strip away any nasty male traits. There are other ways to address this issue but clothing goes a long way to making this reality. Finally, it’s just very pleasant to see a man in a skirt, dress or naked.

6. Control sex. Some go for chastity which I use a little. In general I just prefer to be the one who decides. Control of his sexual ejaculations is a power control mechanism even if, as in my case, I allow it frequently.

7. Control the household finances. This includes taking control over the finances and the earnings of the male. He should not be permitted access to any money and should seek permission from the lady for money. It’s often best that he requests she make purchases for him to avoid him having money which can allow him to feel empowered and independent. This doesn’t mean keeping him in poverty or denying him any treats, it just means overall control. For example, I buy my husband entrance tickets for live football and cricket matches which I don’t attend. I then give him a little pocket money to allow him to buy a drink or food. I think regular pocket money is a good idea for him anyway but obviously not too much.

8. Control social activities. The female should be the sole decider of all social activities and control the marriage diary. For example, if going to watch the cinema the Female will decide what film to watch, what seat to sit in and what snacks to eat and drink. That said I will go to films he asks to go to also.

9. Ensure obedience. This is the foundation of any FLR. Discipline is therefore an important element of the relationship to ensure he complies with your wishes. Verbal discipline is the most usual way to ensure obedience but physical discipline is also part of the training and the re-enforcement. Breaches of obedience should always be met with very strict discipline, either removal of rights or physical punishment such as spanking or slapping.

10. Change his demeanour through language. Correct language when addressing women is needed. Males should use appropriate titles such as madam, mistress etc. My own husband address me as mistress and another submissive male we know uses ma’am to address his wife. Curtseying and thanking women for giving instructions is another reminder of the status level and ensures obedience.
Read More Here

If you’d like a peak at a femdom FLR take a look at these recent & coming soon English Mansion films: WLR Wife Led Relationship & Your Bitch Wife.

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In Search of the Female Orgasm Pt 2

As a woman I need multiple orgasms to be satisfied, that’s why a stable of sex slaves is so useful 🙂 Here my lovely friend Mistress T is kindly helping me out making sure this tongue-slave is working properly!

The Cum Rules
I have had many different ‘Cum Rules’ over the years, (we even made a movie about them once) but one staple is that a slave must give me a large number of orgasms to earn just one for himself – hence the title of that film 50=1.

I also like to use ‘male ejaculation’ as a Pavlovian training tool; he will be permitted to cum but for example: only when my heels are digging into his nipples or when his tongue is right up my arse. The former helps to train his mind to love pain a useful trait for one of my slaves, while the latter helps reinforce his position in My world.

For a woman to be turned on and to cum is a slow and individual process and therefore something a slave must focus all his attentions onto and will need considerable training in. For me even the training is quite a turn on, lying back comfortably on the bed with a crop in hand making sure his tongue is doing what I want – where I want, while any infractions will earn him an extremely hard stroke across his backside.

So, there is too much focus in porn on the act of the man ejaculating and here at The English Mansion I’ll be addressing the balance 🙂 personally…

Photo from Just A Little Sex Toy – a new remastered version now released

Read Pt1 here  – In Search of the Female Orgasm (& Lots of Them) Pt 1

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Maneaters – Femdom Top Ten

Welcome to The English Mansion’s Femdom Top Ten
Our musical Top Tens dedicated to all things kinky

Well this was a very eclectic mix with songs from every decade from the 1950’s to today. With so much choice from kinky boots walking all over you to small penis humiliation. There’s lots of fur in this Top Ten in the title of Venus in Furs but also donned by Madonna, Eartha Kit & Marilyn Monroe. Oh, I just found it funny to include Cliff 🙂 And there were a lot of contenders so there are quite a few excellent tracks that didn’t make it into the Top Ten.

Maneaters – Femdom Top Ten
1   These Boots are Made for Walking
Nancy Sinatra (1966) Play Video
2  Erotica
Madonna (1992) Play Video
3  Maneater
Hall & Oats (1982)
or Nelly Furtado (2006)
Play Video
Play Video
4   Short Dick Man
Fingers & Gillette & 20 Fingers (1994) Play Video
5  Diamonds are a Girls Best Friend
in joint place with
5   Material Girl
Marilyn Monroe/Nicole Kidman (1953/2001) ~ Madonna (1984) Play Video
Play Video
6   Sexy & I Know It
LMFAO (2011) Play Video
7   Wicked Game
Chris Isaak (1989) Play Video
8   Venus
in joint place with
The Female of the Species
Bananarama (1986)
Space (1996)
Play Video
Play Video
9  Kinky Boots
Patrick Macnee & Honor Blackman (1960) Play Video
10 Santa Baby
in joint place with
Devil Woman
Eartha Kitt (1953)

Cliff Richard (1976)

Play Video
Play Video

Contenders that didn’t quite make it into our Top Ten:

Cruella De Vi by Selena Gomez (2008) Play Video
I’m Too Sexy
by Right Said Fred (1992) Play Video
Venus In Furs
by Velvet Underground (1967) Play Video
Sisters Are Doin’ It for Themselves
Eurythmics/Aretha Franklin (1985) Play Video
I Wanna Be Evil
by Eartha Kitt(1953) Play Video
Killer Queen by Queen (1974)  Play Video
Evil Woman by ELO (1976) Play Video
“In These Shoes?” by Kirsty MacColl (2000) Play Video

The English Mansion’s Kinky Top Tens
Take a look at our other musical Top Tens dedicated to all things kinky ~ to be included the rules are: they must be big hit tracks or tracks from internationally well-known performers.
Femdom Crossdressing
Sub/Dom Music to Whip Guys By
Perverted More Music to Whip Guys By
Sexy Femdom Videos
Subversive   Female Power
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10 True Facts About Mistress Sidonia

The birth of a Living Legend 😉

These days I’m continually told I’m a ‘Living Legend’ I recognise it’s meant to be a compliment but it’s a strange tribute making me feel like some kind of ancient myth. And life on a pedestal is not always a comfortable one, there’s only room for one and only one way to go once you are up there – down; but I guess it is an inevitable platitude as I have through The English Mansion opened up my life sharing my musings and exploits as a dominatrix. If there is any kind of legacy I hope my enthusiasm for femdom will seep into the modern consciousness shoring up feminism and encouraging women to explore and enjoy their sexualities whatever their inclinations.

So given many dommes seems to be blogging/vlogging 10 facts about themselves etc. I thought I’d jump on the bandwagon but as readers here are already familiar with my BDSM life and loves, I though I’d let you all know a few lesser facts about moi and why I probably do deserve that legendary status 😉

10 Absolutely True Facts About Mistress Sidonia

1. Once swapped an enema for a car (a 5 Series BMW).

2. Was life banned from two fetish clubs for being too outrageous, Fantastic in Brixton & Spank in Bristol; and given a serious warning at The Skin Two Ball in Hammersmith and only not ejected from the club because she knew the promoters.

Receiving my Erotic Oscar in 1997 from the lead singer of Rockbitch – hey they know how to do award ceremonies at The Sex Manics Ball. And at Torture Garden in the mid ’90s.

3. Was punched unconscious by a (real) nun in the full wimple and habit (she was ironically from a convent called The Good Shepherd Sisters.)

4. Has been skiing in Iran.

5. Was asked to leave The Ritz hotel when a person in her party, a now retired prodom, who will remain nameless, mooned at Margaret Thatcher.

6. Has lived in two stately houses.

7. Was queueing outside Torture Garden, Shepherds Bush when it was closed by the police and was inside at Club Whiplash, Putney when it was raided by the police.

Yep that’s me on the flyer & I’m denounced in the subsequent newspaper expose (1993) which was ridiculous, salacious and of course utterly untrue. My favourite line being “The music was loud but the whipping was louder!” The club won the case and the police got a rap on the knuckles for wasting tax payers money but sadly it led to the demise of Club Whiplash.

8. Received a gift and was taken to the theatre by Lady Diana, Princess of Wales.

9. Involved in the accidental destruction of two works of art: a Salvador Dali & a Peter Blake (I am mightily ashamed of this).

10. Has been awarded a number of infamous fetish awards including an Erotic Oscar 1997 at The Sex Manics Ball; & The Ivar Gold Golden Cane 2003, (being a show-off and trying to interject a little humour she won this ‘best caning award’ while blindfolded).

Attending a Prostitution Pride March (in disguise) in the ’90s (not sure we’re selling it) –  insert chatting with Cynthia Payne

Note: the unscrupulous click bait title is supposed to be ironic it was nearly, “10 thing about Mistress Sidonia & her cute Kitten that You Need to Know!” Though I do apologise for the ceaseless name dropping but hey getting Cynthia Payne, Margaret Thatcher & Salvador Dali all in is impressive (and that wasn’t even all of them) and finally, re. living legend my tongue is firmly in my cheek 🙂

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Animal Farm: Training & Taming Males

Goddess Serena & her pet puppy

Training & Taming Males – Animal Play

Role playing an animal can have a huge appeal – animals don’t speak or think, or even walk upright. They are owned and trained to be obedient but also loved and even pampered. You can let go of your humanity and immerse yourself in a new alien mindset. Animal play has obvious parallels to Dom/Sub play, most notably the collar & leash and the desire to be owned.

The psychology of human animal role-play generally falls into two categories: Pampered Pets & Dehumanised Animals there is however, much cross-over and many of the actualities of the play is the same.

Pampered Pets
Pets want to immerse themselves into the role of a human animal and relish being dressed up and trained, most usually as a puppy or dressage pony though you do also get latex kittens. What appeals to them and their ‘owners’ is the innate characteristics of an animals nature that come into play, these being: obedience; loyalty; devotion; total reliance on their owners, instinctively wanting to please; and the need to be trained.

Pampered Pets enjoy being playful and petted while well behaved human pups can also be quite pampered by adoring dom owners and shown off in public. Pet ponies especially can be kitted out with elaborate harnesses and bells. I was once quite jealous when I saw an amazing well-trained human Dalmatian puppy walking around Erotica one year.

Click on an image to view the Animal Farm slide show:

Dehumanised Animals

This is where men are turned into animals by their cruel Mistresses as a means to totally humiliate and literally dehumanise them. Useless, old or disobedient slaves are reduced to dogs, pigs or workhorses to totally break and humiliate them. It’s the end of the line, he is no longer even a lowly slave, from now on he is not even human any more. He will no longer be able to talk or walk upright. If necessary he can be kept gagged and put in hobble chains (chains that are not long enough for you to stand in). He will eat her scraps from a bowl on the floor (mittens can be used to stop him using his hands).

This can be an extreme punishment/humiliation for a slave, he may have already lost much of his sense of self, his name ect. but now he will not even be treated as human anymore. Ponies also make useful beasts of burden to carry dominant women from place to place, why should they walk when they can ride. So whatever the animal extensive corrective training will be needed.

You can watch dominant women training & taming males in these two recent English Mansion releases with Goddess Serena, Mistress Inka & Miss Marilyn, right now inside our members area: A Puppy’s Tale & Pounding The Pony.

Posted in Femdom Movie News, Goddess Serena, Miss Marilyn, Mistress Inka | Tagged , , , | 3 Comments