Mistress Sidonia's Femdom Blog

No Sex Please, We’re Dominatrices

To fuck, or not to fuck, that is the question?
There’s an age old dispute that’s been ping-ponged round the femdom scene ever since the first domme, pulled on her stiletto boots. Should a dominatrix have sex with her slaves? The resulting barney falls into two unhelpful, reductive camps – hollering “Hell yes!” verse “That’s gross!” at each other.

So should a domina have sex with her slaves? That in itself is a minefield -what is sex? Intercourse, handjobs, reaching orgasm somehow, getting plunged with a strapon, kissing a shoe? So here let’s just focus on actual fucking, ‘carnal knowledge’ – that’s the taboo; the Rubicon that has sundered the femdom scene.

In the past, I’ve been told definitively, that a domme should never have sexual intercourse with a slave. I’m not sure who wrote this ‘rule book’ and certainly have never seen a copy. Personally, it’s a ridiculous supposition. If you think of it the other way around with masters and sub girls, it seems consensual sexual slavery is an exciting and accepted part of those relationships.

Pro Domination & BSDM
Yes, BDSM activities are not synonymous with sex, many do not involve any sexual contact at all. Female domination is a type of erotic play that involves consensual power exchange and control. When done right the sexual/emotional high can be way more intense and overwhelming than vanilla sex or relationships.

I recognize that in the world of commercial domination, sex does not need to be a part of it. A dominatrix-client relationship is a professional one, where boundaries must be set. Both parties must openly communicate and agree levels of physical contact; specific BDSM activities; limits must be set and respected. When I worked as a Prodom, sex was something I didn’t enter into with my clients, but that does not mean it was not an erotic experience. A Mistress/slave relationship is surely more than just a platonic friendship. A consensual power exchange relationship, professional or otherwise, can develop in a mirrad of complex directions. That’s what makes then so unique.

Sexual Submission is *Hot*
For me the act of domination is in itself a sexual one driven by my sexual needs and desires. With my incredible sex drive, I need slaves that can give me a lot of attention. I’ve been privileged to have had 24/7 relationship with male slaves who most certainly were there as my sex slaves. The act of a man giving himself to me, suffering for me and totally submitting himself to my every whim is incredibly lubricious. To humiliate is erotic, to inflict slow sensual pain is erotic, the pure act of owning a slave is in itself extremely erotic.

My personal slaves exist to please me in anyway I choose. To sexually please me anyway I want – that’s my choice and power. Sexual slavery, sexual humiliation and bondage sex all make me super *hot*. Being a dominant Mistress, having slaves is what turns me on, that’s my primary drive for doing it, sex and being pleasured is integral to this. As my good friend Mistress T used to say, “Who wants to have cake and not eat it!”

As a dominant or submissive woman you have agency over your own body, sexuality and desires. In all encounters professional or otherwise, the only rule should be ~ don’t do anything you are uncomfortable with.

Sex Tag Team Dommes ~ with Mistress T, so *Hot*